It continues to be a charmed life living with Bluma. She is so sweet and amazing. We have been battling a regression of her sleeping habits. My baby who was briefly happy to be sleeping alone in her crib for naps, has now decided she wants to be held again. We're slowly working toward progress. The fact that I am blogging now is evidence that she is indeed, snoozing away in her room.
I always have the same internal struggle during those bouts where she is fighting sleep. I will be holding her, rocking her as she's crying and I can tell her little body desperately wants to spend the next half hour slumbering against my chest. My brain tells me that by teaching her to sleep alone, I am giving her a valuable gift. I can't always be there to hold her. However, my heart aches to embrace her as long as she'll allow.
Every day there is a little more time, a little more space between us. There are stretches when she is happily playing and far too busy to snuggle. I know those times will only get to be more frequent as she gains independence and mobility. She is going to grow too fast. I can remember playing in my own childhood home and yard when I was younger. It doesn't feel that long ago. I'm sure to my parents, it feels like a matter of days.
So, I probably hold her a little bit longer than I should. And when I hear her cry, I ocassionally am a bit too eager to soothe her, to bring her out on the couch with me and let her burrow into my breast and find comfort there. Being a mother is like living in a different world. No matter how difficult the day has been, I always miss her when I put her down for the night and I am thankful that she exists. She has brought to my life so much meaning.
This is my favorite picture of the two of us. It is a poor quality photo but it captures how joyous she is nearly every minute of the day.
Enjoying the sunshine at one of Dad's softball practices.
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